4.28 | thriving thirties

happy birthday to me and happy new year! well... my birthday was march 3, but clearly, i have not updated this blog since december 2020. big yikes. as usual, life been happening really fast and i just haven`t been able to stay focused on producing content. so much has happened, ya`ll. now that i`m in a better space mentally and financially, i`m back & better & ready to share what`s been going on with me. i hope ya`ll ready! before i get into all my life shenanigans, i do want to say that the thought of turning thirty scared me. i had a list of goals that i told myself i wanted to achieve before this age, in addition to these unrealistic ideas of what life at 30 was supposed to be. i think we all set ourselves up with these expectations about age. to me, 30 was an age of maturity and true adulthood and i felt like i had not reached that. 

i felt like i was behind. i had to take a step back and realize everything that i had overcome and all the shit i actually accomplished. why was i focusing on the negative? am i crazy?! i`ve done so much dope things in my life and i was overlooking them to focus on the things i hadn`t done. yep - that`s craziness. i secured a hollywood client. i`ve had multiple art shows. i saved a ton of money on my car insurance... LOL just kidding... but i did save a ton of money. i leveled up finally (i`ll touch on that shortly). i bought my dream car (i`ll get to that soon, too). i took a step towards investing in bbhm - working on making it more than merch. i`ve just been out here getting shit done & it`s time i really be proud of myself. 

anywho... i say all that to say your girl has entered the thriving thirties and it feels damn good. for my thirtieth, since we are still in the pandemic, my parents & sisters had an intimate dinner at this restaurant called Roots. i won`t lie, at first i was like... hmm, roots? what kinda mess is this? LOL. the vibe was really classy and sophisticated, though. i won`t go into too much detail about the food but i will say, the portions could`ve been a bit bigger for the price. i`m not into fine dining because honey, i`m still hungry after i leave LOL. i need a bit more bang for my buck when i`m eating, but the service was really good and we did enjoy ourselves.

for my birthday look, i chose to wear this mugler corset blazer that i bought so many years ago and i`ve only worn it once... twice including this instance. smh. this exemplified sophistication, elegance and boss vibes to me so that`s why it was chosen for the night. i paired it with my levi`s that i distressed a bit and cuffed (because i love a good oversized cuff). i purchased these jeans on sale from the men`s section and i spoke about that in this video (if you prefer to hear me talk). lastly, my new babies... the OG mojito heel by julian hakes. yes - i`m sure you`ve seen the knockoff bottega version and the beautiful version ottolinger did in collaboration with julian. i chose to purchase the chrome colored heels and when i say i`m in love - I`M IN LOVE. they are sooo comfortable and just so unique in its design. i love how they just pair well with just about anything. i`m a denim girl all the way so it is just perfect with all of my jeans.

& i brought my birthday in with my new baby, tangerine... tangy, for short. i had always wanted to purchase a new lexus after my dad gave me his over ten years ago. however, a few short years ago, i started obsessing over this RC. my first love was the GS, then i wanted the IS, but then... i saw a guy with the RC and i was like this is my car! it just looked like a cool ass spaceship and i wanted it.

however, the opportunity just wasn`t presenting itself the way i wanted it to. i went to virginia and saw one, but i had just quit my job and i just didn`t want to add another expense to my plate. the timing was just all off. fast forward to this past january. after i colored my hair orange, i just randomly went and searched for an RC and what do you know? there was an orange one! i found one on a sunday and made an appointment to see it on a monday. the car ended up being purchased online. your girl was sad, but i don`t really take 'no' for an answer... especially when i want something.

i see it, i want it and i go get it. i entered my thirties thriving forreal. everything just fell right into place when i was ready for it and not just when i wanted it. a very happy birthday, indeed.

i was scared to turn thirty because i thought i had failed in my twenties, but i didn`t. what i thought were failures were lessons that prepared me for today! i`m happy that i kept going and didn`t give up on myself even when i felt like shit just wasn`t going the way i thought it was supposed to. i felt discouraged alot but i kept moving forward and going after what i want, what i deserve. i`ll share what i wrote on my instagram post below. i hope when this message finds you, or when you find this message, that it forces you to be kind to yourself, be proud of your achievements and pushes you to keep going.

keep going! you may not be where you want to be right now (& i know it`s hard)
but stay at it until you get there. you will be so happy and proud of yourself that you did.
it is so rewarding when you look back at your journey and see your growth, progression...
and it`s all paying off.
it doesn`t matter if it only took someone else 2 steps or 1 step, and if it`s taken you 10 or more steps.
your journey is yours and you will always end up exactly where you need to be.
what`s for you will always be for you. keep at it.

bday look
blazer thierry mugler jeans levi's shoes julian hakes bag telfar
- the broke girl